I told you he has no feelings for you, Ronnie. He's not even trying to get hard. And you, you gave better blowjobs when you were twelve."I realized at that moment that Carl was completely serious about killing me and about possibly killing Ronnie. I was reacting in stress before this, but now it settled in.There are several stages of grief and I blew through them in a matter of seconds. I probably skipped over some, but I was grieving for myself and grieving for the future, or my lack thereof, so maybe the rules are a bit different.I had, I realized, already been in denial. I got angry for a few moments, at Carl, at Ronnie, at myself, at God, even at the guys who built the building. It passed.I was set to try bargaining with Carl, but one look at his face and I knew it would be a waste of time. I'd tried to lie to him already, and I had nothing with which to bargain. I decided to keep what dignity I had.The depression took a minute or so to move through as Ronnie began to work. ‘Thanks for…well…um…I had a nice time. Call me, okay?’ I nodded miserably as he planted a fast kiss on my cheek and hurried out the front door. Blaine just kept looking at me with a smirk on her lips, and her little boy-toy parroted it easily. ‘I’m going to bed,’ I pulled the robe closed over my shoulders and with what little dignity I had left, marched up the stairs. Blaine tried to call me back down, giggling all the while, but I shut myself up in my room, prepared to die a slow death. ‘That’s what I get for trying to follow her advice…’ I turned on my side in bed and licked my lips. I could still taste Daniel in my mouth, and I didn’t hate it at all. Men were so unique tasting, so musky and warm…I loved it, but couldn’t help wondering about how other women tasted. My thoughts turned to Blaine once more, and I growled out loud. There was no use thinking about that when in a matter of moments she and her date would be screwing. At that moment, there was a loud bang at my door. I.
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